Winnernerd: Shocker.
IV: It's come to my attention that you go by the name of Winnernerd. All of us on the newspaper staff are curious as to what the name on your birth certificate is. Would you care to tell us what it is?
W: Oh, well.... I'm sure I've got it tattooed somewhere......
IV: Ok moving on. What do you like to do in your freetime?
W: Make posts, read, watch TV, go to camp, be with friends.
IV: Ah. Typical teenager doings.
W: Sure.
IV: Who would you say you're best friend is?
W: Google Images.
IV: Interesting. Speaking of Google Images, how do you seem to find those outrageous pictures on your blog?
W: You don't read the text, do you? (Winnernerd is beginning to get annoyed)
IV: Excuse me?
W: The text says I type in a random word and post the first appropriate picture that comes up.
IV: Oh. Ok.
W: Way to go.
IV: Alright moving on. How old are you, um, Winnernerd?
W: Oh my God you're an (idiot) incredible newscaster. Most people don't ask me that. The problem is this kinda brings us back to birth certificate issue, doesn't it?
IV: Oh, right. (Looks down at her notes, starting to remember the job adds in the newspaper this morning.)
W: Yup.
IV: Yeah.
W: Yep....
IV: Mmm-hmm.
W: You're new, aren't you?
IV: Yes. (Thinking about the party she is being thrown for being on the newspaper staff for 20 years tomorrow.)
W: You ran out of questions.
IV: Well you put down everything I asked.
W: Big deal. I thought you were trained for this stuff.
IV: You're a brat, you know that?
W: I guess so.
IV: I feel bad for you're parents.
W: Whereas the rest of the country feels bad for you.
IV: What the hell are you talking about?
W: I'm recording this. It's called the internet.
IV: You suck.
W: I'd choose my words carefully if I were you.....
IV: Just be quiet.
W: (silence)
IV: Ok let's make a truce. If you don't put that on the internet, I won't slap you.
W: What an appealing offer.
IV: It's people like you that make my day, honestly.
W: You know what I hate? People that say honestly even when they're lying.
IV: Is that a deal?
W: Correct.
IV: BYE.
W: Bye.
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1 comment:
pure brillance
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